The Verdict Is In

14 Jul

After the email from my Aunt (we will call her Aunt Patty), things started to unfold so fast. Within the next few days, she told her daughter and other son about me. Her daughter sent me an email and added me on Facebook while her son added me on Facebook and we chatted there. Anna had asked for a picture of my biological mother so she could show it to her grandmother and see if maybe she might have known my mother.

Everyone was so nice! They seemed genuinely excited to have a new addition to the family and were curious about who this new person was.  It was fun learning about everyone and seeing some of the things we have in common. Little did I know that Aunt Patty was hard at work behind the scenes.

Aunt Patty kept in touch. She said she was sorry she could not tell me who my father was but told me stories about both of them. I heard about some of their traditions, families, etc. She also sent me pictures of her brothers and herself. I sent her some pictures of me. I asked her if I reminded her of anyone. Nothing prepared me for her response!!!

She wrote me and said she wished she could tell me 100% who my father was but she can tell me in her heart who she believes it is. She said that she had a long talk with her brother. She told him all about me and showed him the picture of my biological mother. He said he did not recognize her and that he was not my father. Seeing his face and hearing him out, she believed him. She truly believed that her other brother (father #1) was my biological father. She even went as far as to say that I remind her a bit of him. He was such a good man. They did coffee together every Friday until he was too sick to do it anymore. He raised his daughters on his own and was very good to his mother. He called her every day and visited her often when she was in the nursing home.  He was also Patty’s daughter’s god father. Every year at Easter he sent her a corsage from her “secret admirer.” What an absolute sweetheart!! She said that if he knew I existed he would have been sure to be a part of my life and that he would have loved me.

So there is was. I would never know 100% but it seemed pretty darn sure. She of all people would know her brother and be able to tell if he was being honest with her. Plus, so many of the clues that I found along the way seemed to point to him. In all honesty, even though he was gone which means that just like my biological mother I will never be able to meet him and their story will always be a mystery, just hearing about the man he was, I would be thrilled if he was my biological father. Everyone tells me stories about the person my biological mother was. It would make so much sense if it was him. And wouldn’t it be nice that even if I can never meet my biological father in the end, that the memory of him that I am introduced to is such a good and positive one!

I was finally finding my peace. Little by little. It wasn’t quite closure, but it was peace. I still hoped for the rest. I still hoped in time maybe Patty’s brother would give me that closure. But this….this was all something I can live with. This was really darn close.  Father #1 was the first person on the list of potentials at the beginning of my search that I felt the instant connection to. It would make sense if it was him. I would be happy if it was him.


4 Responses to “The Verdict Is In”

  1. thegenealogygirl July 14, 2017 at 6:44 pm #

    Oh! I have so many questions. Have you considered asking Father #1s children to test? You would match as half-siblings. So exciting!


    • citygirl0801 July 14, 2017 at 6:56 pm #

      haha! Ask away! The 2 daughters don’t know about me as far as I know. Anna’s father tried to contact the eldest but she did not get back to him (they are not very close). That was when he decided to go directly to father #2. Butttt….when he told me he was going to the eldest daughter, that was my very first though…a sibling test!! I googled to make sure there were a real thing. haha! I was so excited at the possibility and then POOF….blew up in my face. As it turns out, I could test with the child of father #1 and the child of father #2 but it would not be an accurate test because half siblings and cousins share the same percentage of DNA. Which means that the test could come back that I am siblings with the daughter of father #1 and cousins with the daughter #2 but biologically that could be flip flopped. The only way the sibling test works is if your two potential fathers are not brothers 😦 I was sooooo bummed!!!! it was like I had a carrot dangled in my face and then ripped away!!

      Liked by 1 person

      • thegenealogygirl July 14, 2017 at 8:40 pm #

        Oh darn it! What about Father #2? Is he willing to test? Have you offered to pay for the test?


  2. citygirl0801 July 15, 2017 at 4:12 am #

    He didn’t want me to contact him when he first found out about me so a test wouldn’t be much of an option….though I would say since then, positive steps forward have been made and I think there is hope that I will find closure at the end of it all! Here is to hoping. I am open to any other suggestions you might have too 🙂


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